Never Again
by Angel Weasel-Woman
Summary: Two years after the disappearance of Naruto, Tsunade recieves a letter urging her back to her home in Amestris. Sequal to Hell Is For Children.
1. Letter

Just tell the nurse, you slipped and fell  
It starts to sting as it starts to swell  
She looks at you, she wants the truth  
It's right out there in the waiting room  
With those hands  
Lookin just as sweet as he can  
Never Again

- Never Again, Nickleback

* * *

"You know he's standing out there trying to hear this." 

Tsunade didn't bother to look up from the scrolls she was absently working her way through. "Let him. He won't hear anything worthwhile."

"If I may say so," Kakashi spoke, "you should at least tell him that--"

"I have already done what I can and made my report." Tsunade's eyes flickered up to meet Kakashi's. "And there have been no official questions to my authority, now have there?"

"That doesn't stop people from speculating." Kakashi tilted his head to one side. "After almost two years, you'd think that you'd change his status at least to KIA."

"You would think that, wouldn't you." Tsunade returned her attention to the scroll, effectively ending the conversation before it could begin again. Kakashi withheld a sigh and began to leave the office, pausing only when Tsunade called after him, "Tell Sasuke that loitering outside my office is not only impolite, but a fire hazard."

"Yes, ma'am." Kakashi gave a flourishing bow and stepped out of the office. He had hardly closed the door behind him when he noticed the lanky man lounging in one of the plush waiting chairs. An air of nonchalance hung about him, as though he were not attempting to eavesdrop on the Hokage's private conversations.

"You heard the lady, Sasuke," Kakashi told the man. "You're being a fire hazard."

Sauke looked up, gracefully quirking an eyebrow. "I don't know what you're talking about. I'm out of the way, aren't I?"

"Not enough for Tsunade-_sama_." Kakashi watched as Sasuke pulled himself to his feel with all the liquid grace of a cat. His black pants made no sound as he stalked by the elder ninja and the wide-necked white shirt, emblazoned on the back with the familiar Uchiha crest, drooped off his shoulder, revealing a large scar as though his entire shoulder had been brunt near-completely off.

"She should be used to me by now."

Kakashi caught up to the man in two strides, falling in-step with him as they made their way out of the Hokage Tower. "It doesn't matter how long you sit outside her office, she won't tell you anything."

Sasuke's hand clenched, but that was the only sign of his outrage. "And yet she would tell that idiot anything his little heart desired."

"She doesn't want you going off on some holy crusade to bring him back." Kakashi watched Sasuke out of the corner of his eye. "You shouldn't take this so personally, you know."

"And why not?" Sasuke reached up to absently touch his shoulder, knowing that the black fire would never appear again. "It was my fault completely that he left, why shouldn't I be allowed to beg his forgiveness?"

Kakashi shook his head. "I don't know how you got that notion into your head, but you should just drop it." He turned to look at Sasuke with complete seriousness in his eye. "Naruto left. That's all anyone knows."

Sasuke glared at Kakashi, eyes flashing a deep crimson. Silence befell the two men, tension filling the air so thick it was almost impossible to breathe. Kakashi kept his arms crossed over his chest, and Sasuke kept his arms lingering at his sides, though both knew that the other would be quick enough to strike even from the facade of relaxation that had cast its spell over them.

Tense minutes passed by, feeling like hours but as fleeting as seconds, before Sasuke turned away. He growled to himself in anger and hissed, "You're wrong, Kakashi."

Before anything more could be said, not that there would be, Sasuke had vanished in a puff of smoke.

* * *

Tsunade stretched backwards in her chair, throwing her arms above her head and wiggling her fingers to make sure blood still circulated in them. She gave a little squeal of a yawn, trying to breathe at the same time trying to stifle it in case anyone decided it was time for her to retire for the day. Sunset cast light though her window, staining her office a deep golden orange. The lamps had not been turned on yet, for Tsunade was fond of the color flooding the room. 

Outside her office, she could hear the footfalls of Shizune, possibly coming to inform her of the time and ask whether or not she was going to go home. Tsunade looked mournfully at her desk, where a stack of scrolls still waited for her approval.

'I shouldn't have taken this job,' she thought to herself, not for the first time.

With a pouting sigh, she reached for the stack, taking off the top-most scroll. As she was about to unfurl it, she blinked at the flash of white she suddenly saw hidden between a pair of scrolls.

"What's this?" She reached out with a delicate-looking hand and pulled out a pearly white envelope, her full name written in rick black ink. The first scroll she had grabbed dropped and her face paled. "Did they really...?"

She flipped open the envelope, shattering the hauntingly familiar red wax seal, and drew out the thick paper, reading the words penned in the same expensive ink she knew so well.

"Dearest Cousin Tsunade,

"It is my deepest regret that I have been unable to contact you in so long. Since you did not leave us an address when you left, it is only through the ingenious way of messenger hawk that I am able to get this to you.

"Mother and Father are still waiting for you to come back, indeed your room is still being prepared for you just as you liked it. Katherine also wishes to see you again, for I myself am unable to practice lifting the piano with her as I have been accepted into the glorious military branch here.

"In regards to the message your hawk left, I must say I have indeed come across a boy such as the one you described. He arrived here not more than two years ago and is in the very best of health now.

"Even if you wish not to visit the home that took you in when you were lost, I shall be glad to assist you in the retrieval of the young boy named Naruto.

"Sincerest regards,

"Major Alex Louis "Strong Arm" Armstrong."

* * *

This is actually going quicker than I thought it would. I didn't think I'd have this chapter up for months. But anyway, I don't own Naruto nor FMA, so, till next time! 


	2. Entourage

For the second time in as many days, Kakashi stood in Tsunade's office. This time, though, he was accompanied by six others. Iruka stood to his left, the haggard, tired look he'd been wearing for two years now completely hidden beneath a mask of strict attention. Sakura and Hinata stood side-by-side behind the two teachers, watching Tsunade with the solemnity that came from being her students for years. Kiba stood at attention in the corner of the room, Akamaru towering over all of them like some giant idol of marble. Standing on either side of Tsunade's desk were Shikamaru and Jiraiya, the former looking like he would rather be anywhere else at that moment and the latter attempting to look down Tsunade's vast cleavage. Shizune and Tonton were at their usual spot just behind the _hokage_'s desk, glowering at Jiraiya with all the fury of older siblings whose younger had been slighted.

Tsunade's hands were folded under her chin, elbows resting on the ancient oak desk. A faraway look was in her eyes and there was a slight hint of white paper resting under a large bouquet of dying flowers. Her perfectly reddened lips were set in the slightest for frowns and the smallest of creases was between her brows. The blue-violet diamond on her forehead flashed as she bowed her head once and then looked up as she spoke softly.

"I have received word from a reliable source that Uzumaki Naruto may have been spotted." She paused, allowing the words to sink into hopeful minds. "He may have moved on since then, but this information is the most we've been able to gather since he vanished." Her gaze flickered from person to person, reading their very souls through their eyes. "I have called you together since you will be part of a special search team. Each of you has been selected specifically for your abilities as well as your relation to Uzumaki." She turned her gaze upon Kiba and Akamaru. "Inuzuka-_san_, does Akamaru-_san_ have Uzumaki's scent already, or will it be necessary to obtain a sample of his clothing?"

Kiba looked once at Akamaru and, through an unconscious signal born from working closely for so long, shook his head. "Akamaru has the scent already."

"Good." Tsunade stood and walked round her desk so that she could face the quartet behind her. "Jiraiya - I know that you have refused the _hokage_'s position once before, but now I ask of you to assume the position temporarily." Her eyes flashed, cutting off a cry from both Jiraiya and Shizune. "For this mission it is imperative that I go along as well, as hard as it is for me to accept and leave this village defenseless. I have more trust in you, Jiraiya, than I do in most others, and you know me well enough that I would never make this decision lightly."

The old man sighed in distaste. He scratched the back of his head and was about to disagree out of sheer spite, when his eyes caught hers. He could see that Tsunade was weary, that the strain of losing one of her favorite _shinobi_ and citizens was becoming far too much for her. He could even see some of her wrinkles and knew in that moment how little care she had been taking care of herself. 'If finding Naruto could help her…'

Jiraiya crossed his arms and looked away. "If you die, Tsunade-_hime_, I'll never forgive you."

Tsunade felt a smile of relief cross her features. Allowing herself to relax slightly, she turned to Shikamaru and spoke again. "Nara-_san_, I entrust you and Shizune with the task of keeping Jiraiya in-line. Help him out when he needs it and, for God's sake, don't let him destroy my village."

"Hey!" Jiraiya spouted suddenly, glowering. "If you don't trust me then why did you give me the damn job?!"

"We'll keep an eye out, Tsunade-_sama_," Shizune piped up with a little grin.

Shikamaru made an annoyed noise in the back of this throat, but nodded his consent anyway. "If I absolutely must, _Hokage-sama_."

Tsunade's eyes thanked them and she turned back to the small entourage gathered before her. "We will meet tomorrow at sunrise at the foot of the _Hokage_ Mountains. If you are late," she glared at Kakashi without pausing, "then we will have no choice but to leave you behind. Understood?"

"Yes, ma'am!"

"Excellent. You are dismissed."

At once there was a sharp confusion as clouds of smoke appeared to whisk away the two teachers and Kiba energetically raced Akamaru out the door, whooping with glee. Hinata spared a few words with Sakura and turned away, fingers tapping together and a small blush on her cheeks. Sakura herself stayed only a few moments, looking at Tsunade for a long while before sighing and following Hinata away. Shizune was animatedly scolding Jiraiya, Tonton looking just as snippy, though Shikamaru looked as though he were the one being berated. Tsunade said something quickly to Shizune, the dark-haired woman halting her verbal assault long enough to acknowledge and respond to the _hokage_ in a few short words.

Satisfied that she wasn't going to be on the receiving end of one of Shizune's lectures later on, Tsunade gracefully picked up her almost-abandoned letter from under the vase and began the trek from the top of the _Hokage_ Tower to her house, half a mile away from the hospital. The whiteness of the envelope was already staring to dull from her constant handling of it, the ink just beginning to smear and leave a ghostly double-image on the expensive paper. Her manicured nails dug into the envelope, feeling it crinkle along the neatly folded lines and almost rip.

'Cousin Alex Louis…' she thought wistfully. 'I never thought I would hear from any of them ever again. And so suddenly soon – no forewarning at all.' She heaved a sigh and looked up at the sky – a perfect shade of blue she had only seen once before in all her life. 'I hope to God you've found him, cousin…'

* * *

I think It's fun to note that this piece was never supposed to exist. I was just supposed to jump straight from Hell is for Children to Youth of the Nation and just explain as I went along. Now we have this thing which, hopefully, should be at least five or so chapters, if not more. Anyway, I own neither FMA nor Naruto, so, till next time!


	3. Tickets

The stars were still twinkling in the sky as Hinata sat her bag on her ground. Above her, the giant stone head of the second Hokage stared out into the distance with his eternal grimace, and all around trees shed shadows from the lamplights. Fidgeting slightly, she peeked up into the sky, realizing that, in her haste, she still had at least another hour's wait until anyone else was supposed to show up. She tapped her fingertips together, allowing herself the nervous habit she thought she had rid herself of. The light violet irises of the Hyuuga clan had vanished in the lack of light, leaving her completely white eyes to drink in the sight of darkness.

"Naruto-_kun_..." she sighed softly, allowing her bangs to fall in her face. It had been two years now, she thought to herself. Two years since he had vanished without a trace and hardly twelve hours since the first clue to his whereabouts. Her fingers tapped quicker, nails almost stabbing into her flesh if she had not years of practice at this habit, and she bit the tip of her tongue to keep from crying.

It was all too often now that she felt tears welling in her eyes. Even when she had been abused and abandoned by her own clan, she had never shed a tear because she's always had someone to look up to – someone who would never give up despite anything. But when Naruto disappeared, taking all the warmth and joy from her life and leaving her with nothing at all, she found that even the slightest things could trigger her. The sound of laughter, the sky on a perfect summer day, even the occasional rambunctious cursing of energetic child who had just learned those words.

She wondered, not for the first time and not for the last, about what could have possibly made her young idol run off. She wondered if there was anything that she could have done to prevent it. She wondered if there was anything _anyone_ could have done to prevent it.

A sound emerged from the trees before her – one not caused by the wind – and Hinata's insides turned to ice, though she gave no outer sign of it. Still tapping her fingers, she turned to her bag and plopped down next to it, pretending to cradle it for comfort while surreptitiously searing for her _kunai_. The sound came again, and she was about to hurl the sharpened metal when a familiar voice called out from behind her.

"Hinata-_chan_, what are you doing here so early?"

The sound stopped and any presence she might have felt from it disappeared along with it. Resisting a sigh, she timidly smiled up at Sakura who was approaching.

"I could ask you the same thing, Sakura-_san_," Hinata said softly, smiling as gently as she could. "Good morning."

Sakura gave a sheepish smile and returned the greeting. "I just couldn't keep sleeping. I know we should be rested up for this mission, but…"

"I understand." Hinata stood, a _kunai_ vanishing up her jacket sleeve without a sound.

"With this being our first even vague hint and all…" Sakura continued, walking up to Hinata and standing next to her. "It's impossible to see how everyone else _isn't_ here yet."

Hinata gave a little smile and leaned against the stone wall just behind her. For a moment, she thought she saw something and was about to let loose with her _kunai_, when a loud howl broke the silence. Akamaru bounded across the path, almost slamming into the cliff side if not for his expert reaction times. Kiba, who had been following behind, whooped loudly to catch the dog's attention as Tsunade, Iruka and Kakashi slowly emerged behind him.

"I hope you realize that you are all an hour and a half early for this mission," Tsunade stated when the group was fully assembled.

"Is that so? I never would have noticed," Kakashi mused, earning himself an emerald-eyed glare. "But seeing as how we've assembled early, shall we leave early, too?"

Tsunade looked at the sky as Hinata had done previously, seeming to consider something. She folded her arms under her breasts and worried her bottom lip with her teeth for less than a moment. "We will leave now. Follow me."

Without any pomp or splendor Tsunade led the group away from the cliff side, dodging through the trees and bouncing over rooftops taking them, not towards the village gates as had been expected, but to the very center of the city. She paused only twice – once when they were standing before the _Hokage_ tower, which stood at the exact center of the Fire country, where she looked around and seemed in the midst of remembering something, only to suddenly lead them to the west. The second time was after she had led them through dark alleyways behind houses none of them had ever seen.

They were dodging under an open windowsill, when Tsunade stopped so suddenly that the others almost ran into her. She cast a furtive glance about herself, catching Hinata's eye. The young Hyuuga, after working with the esteemed _hokage_ for so long, recognized the signal and silently activated her _Byakugan_. Immediately, the darkness vanished, replaced by a hazy blue light that brought every detail of every object into focus. The veins in her temples and eyes pulsated almost painfully with a sudden rush of blood and _chakra_, but multiple uses of her clan's skill had long since desensitized her to it. She twisted her head slightly, this way and that, to compensate for the Hyuuga blind spot as she looked in every direction at once.

Nothing, she informed her teacher silently. There's nothing here except us.

Good, was the reply and Tsunade took off once again without warning, though no one struggled behind.

* * *

Iruka wasn't sure about when the last time he'd seen a train was, but he knew he would never forget it. The way the giant of steel towered over him, wisps of steam and clouds of black smoke bellowing out into the sky, staining it a deep brown. The loud roaring as the earth trembled beneath his feet, submitting all it had to the beast. The sharp iron tracks leading off into forever. 

The station was set in very possibly the middle of nowhere. Never had they passed through the city gates, so Iruka knew there were at least still in _Konohagakure_, but nowhere he had ever seen. There were no people outside on the flight of stairs, no persons behind the help booths, no one to watch over the main doors. There was no one inside the station either, leaving their footsteps to echo loudly in the overbearing silence. Even the so-called _shinobi_ streets – the flat rooftops of the village – held more noise than this steel tomb, and ninja were known make even less noise than a hunting owl.

He suddenly heard a loud sound – the deep ringing of a bell signaling an incoming train – that made everyone's insides jump as Tsunade walked calmly up to a counter with the word "TICKETS" painted in fading red above it. There was a woman behind a panel of hazy glass that allowed nothing but her silhouette to be seen. The hokage spoke a few words into a microphone, much too soft for anyone to hear aside the mysterious woman, and there was the oddly soothing sound of white noise as the woman gave a response. Tsunade turned to the group, eyes seeking out Kiba and Akamaru who were standing faithfully side-by-side.

"Inuzuka-_san_," Tsunade said in a voice that seemed too loud in such a deserted place. "Is there any way you can get Akamaru-_san_ to become smaller?"

"Smaller?" Kiba looked up as Akamru looked down. "How small does he need to be?"

"The size of a regular dog," was the quick answer. "Otherwise we won't be able to go on."

At the very thought that they would have to give up so soon, Kiba made a few quick hand seals. A line of invisible blue _chakra_ ran between the dog and man and, with a silent puff of smoke, the dog was all too suddenly the size of a small puppy – the size he had been when he had first entered the _chuunin_ exam with Kiba. The human Inuzuka grimaced slightly at the overuse of _chakra_, but when he looked up Tsunade was nodding.

"That will be fine." She turned back momentarily to the ticket booth and seized the thick strips of paper the shadow woman was pushing through a small hole at the bottom of the glass. Tickets in hand, Tsunade handed each of the group one of them. They were plainly decorated, being made of creamy yellow paper with the words "_Konoha_-Central" written dead center in _Kanji_ as well as _Romaji_ on both sides of it. A thin beaded line crossed between the words, overlapping the hyphen and, when Sakura tested it, it proved to be the way to rend it in half without damage to the rest of the ticket.

Tsundae looked upon the group of five (six including Akamaru) and then at the two tickets left in her hand. She glanced over them, seeing that every person had a ticket (Kiba with a second for Akamaru) and then looked back at the ticket booth. But the silhouette was already gone, vanished before any questions could be posed. A mournful sigh escaped her lips and she turned suddenly, putting her hands on her hips and addressing a hidden shadow lingering behind them.

"Sasuke, if you're coming, get your ass up here."

Kakashi looked on with an odd mixture of disappointment and elation as the surviving Uchiha emerged from behind an empty help booth. His sudden appearance and scent startled Akamaru so much, he let out a comically cute growl, the sound cutting short as the dog wondered at what could have produced the sound so different from his original voice. Sasuke regarded the shrunken dog with a hint of annoyance and strode defiantly up to Tsunade. She was glaring at him, but he gave her a cool look and held out his hand expectantly.

"I have to go," was the only statement he made.

Tsunade slapped the ticket in his hand, but before she let go, she said acidly, "If you ruin this mission, boy, you will be stripped of all position, status, privileges, citizenship, and basic human rights, do you understand?"

Sasuke closed his hand around the ticket and responded, "Shouldn't we get on the train?"

* * *

I'm graduating high school in less than a week. I'm scared -.-;; 

But so that everyone knows, summer is the worst time for me to write. Why? Because I'm working all the time and when I get home I'm too tired to do anything but sleep. So don't expect rapid-fire updates like this for a while, unfortunately. But I do intend to finish this trilogy! So never fear, loyal readers!

Well, I don't own FMA or Naruto, so, till next time!


	4. Planning

The whistle blared out a last-call, making the train vibrate. The compartment was completely empty save for the single group of ninja. Tsunade and Iruka shared a bench, the former looking much bored and the latter trying not to peer out the window in curiosity every few seconds. Kakashi sat across from them, arms folded and head bowed, looking for all the world like he was sleeping. Sakura and Hinata were in the bench near the compartment door, checking their bags and making sure of their inventory. Kiba sat on the other side of the train, scratching Akamaru behind his tiny ears and trying to push away the lonesome feeling he always got when Ino wasn't there. On the very opposite end of the compartment, farthest away from everyone possible, Sasuke huddled himself up gracefully in a bench, forehead pressed agaisnt the glass. His legs were bunched up under him so that he would be able to leap to his feet should the need arise and his arms were draped at his sides loosely so as to give him access to anything he might need to grab. He appeared to look out the window, but actuality kept an eye on the faint reflections in the glass.

The sounds were loud and the movement was jerky as the train started up, huffing down the tracks slowly. Speed built up little by little and the great bounces and jumps smoothed out into a continuous rumble. The discomfort and the fear that each _shinobi _felt melted away with the vibrations, leaving their feelings along the rusted tracks. A little yawn escaped Tsundae, followed quickly by Iruka then Kakashi, then all the younger students. The _godaime_ didn't fight off the wave of sudden sleep that fell upon her, instead relaxing into the familiar embrace. The two teachers exchanged glances, looked at the peaceful hokage and then at the teenagers scattered about the compartment, each drifting off into their own slumber. Kakashi nodded once to show the trust he held in Tsunade and then closed his eyes, folding his arms across his lap as Iruka relaxed himself into a comfortable-yet-alert slouch and slept.

Sasuke stayed awake, fighting off the sleeping spell as long as he could. He continued to watch the reflections in the glass, the images before him being noticed only in the back of his consciousness. And it was only there that he realized something.

There was no movement. The trees, the hills, the stones all stayed exactly where they were. The train did not move across the tracks, but their very souls traveled as far as they could go.

* * *

Edward's eyes drifted open lazily. He saw the dull grey ceiling of the military-issued dorms through a haze of gold. The three blankets he had piled on top of himself, despite the summer heat, had been kicked off during the night, but there was still a warm weight on his chest. His automail arm clicked and chinked, reminding him to let Winry have a look at it when he got the chance, as he reached up to move his bangs out of his eyes. 

The weight on him, as comfortable as it was, shifted and grumbled, a sleepy snort escaping. A single blue cracked open and Edward felt lips tickle his chest as Naruto murmured, "Good morning, Ed-_kun_."

Edward moved forward to plant a quick kiss on Naruto's forehead in greeting, asking playfully, "What are you doing in here? Don't you have your own bed at Lieutenant Havoc's?"

Naruto sat up, stretching his arms above his head lazily and making his white cotton shirt (stolen from Havoc a few weeks ago) rise up to show a teasing amount of flesh just above his pajama bottoms. Edwards eyes moved down his lover's body and he could see the faint markings of a sun-like spiral scarred into Naruto's stomach forever. He felt his insides twist and his heart begin to hammer rapidly, but forced those feelings down, reminding himself that he wouldn't get hurt again and that Naruto and that woman he called his aunt (Fox demon? There was no way. Demons didn't exist and even if they did, that woman was one of the more normal people he'd ever met.) had sworn on their very lives that they would look after him.

"Is that really something to say to your boyfriend?" Naruto was asking sleepily, drawing Edward out of his darkened thoughts and back into the warm present. He yawned and sat himself more comfortably just above Edward's hips, legs straddling the other blonde's waist. Again, Edward felt that flash of fear, but he squashed it deep within himself, reaching up to cup Naruto's cheek instead of pushing him away. "Besides," Naruto murmured, leaning into the metal hand and warming it with his breath, "Kedit-_baba_ decided to stay over at Havoc-_dono_'s last night and I didn't want to have to listen to them. Again."

"Did you see Alphonse this morning?"

"No. But I did come in through your window, so he might still be here."

As though on cue, a hollow voice echoed through the closed door, calling out, "Big brother? Miss. Kedit is looking for Naruto, is he in there with you?"

"I'm not here," Naruto called. "Try looking somewhere else."

"Come on, bratling," Kedit called as well, her voice accompanied by a loud banging on the bedroom door. "It's our day off and I need you to go somewhere with me."

Naruto sighed and cast a longing look at Edward who just smiled and pushed Naruto off him gently. "If you don't go, she'll keep yelling at you."

Naruto stood at the side of the bed, stretching lazily. "I know. I just wanted to spend a little more time with you."

Edward leaned over and gave Naruto a soft kiss, feeling the other boy's arms drape around his neck lightly. Gentle teeth nipped at his lips, and Edward felt a pleasant shiver run down his spine, warming even his automail with a soft heat. Naruto pulled away with a cheeky grin and Edward hugged him once before turning away to get dressed.

"I'll see you later, Ed-kun," Naruto said, walking out the door.

"I'll be where we usually are," Edward called after him, and Naruto gave a thumbs up at acknowledge the words as Kedit immediately grabbed his arm and dragged him off.

* * *

Naruto sighed pointedly, plopping down on the park bench. Before him, the single water fountain stood like an ancient idol, ivy and moss growing out of control. Thick vines snaked between what had once been concrete statues of children playing, their various toys and instruments once supplying a stream of water now clogged by age. The main statue, a life-sized woman with two wings and her hands raised to the sky, was chipped away, missing one of her hands and half her face to reveal the simplistic mechanics designed to spray water forth from her fingertips. The grass spread out in thick waves from the base of the fountain, once only "unruly" and now descended into "chaotic". Benches made of stone, and one of dilapidated wood, sat at each of the eight compass points, though they were scarcely decorated and almost as overrun with growth as the fountain. 

Kedit surveyed the land with one hand on her hip. Her black miniskirt danced across the tops of her thigh-high faux-leather boots in a gust of wind, and her low necked red shirt fell off one shoulder to reveal her bra strap. Her nine braids seemed to quiver, but a quick swipe of her hand stilled any energy that might have escaped.

"Do you think this is right?" she asked out loud, nervously fingering her _hoshi-no-tama_ that she had strung up around her neck. The pear-shaped ball glowed dully against the base of her throat and she glanced at Naruto out of the corner of her eye. "Well?"

"How should I know?" Naruto grumbled. "You haven't told me why we're looking at random places. It's past noon and I haven't had any food today - I'm hungry."

"You're being whiney again," Kedit growled irritably. Without another word on the matter, or any matter at that, she turned sharply and stalked out of the park, Naruto catching up and keeping pace in three steps. She grabbed one of her braids and began to gnaw on the rubber tie at the base. Naruto contemplated asking his "aunt" why she was being neurotic again, but didn't. He would probably only be cursed at again.

"Where are we going this time?" Naruto chanced to ask, hands shoved deep in his pockets. Kedit and Naruto had stopped by Havoc's long enough for Naruto to dress in a pair of black slacks and a bright orange shirt, both of which Havoc had bought for him when he'd first arrived in Central. He wished he'd managed to grab a jacket since the weather was starting to cool down, but Kedit had rushed him so bad he was surprised he had his shoes on.

The Fox gave a mournful sigh around her mouthful of hair. Releasing her braid, she offered Naruto a small smile and said, "Would you like to go get some ramen? I'll pay for it."

Immediately the boy brightened and he threw his arms around Kedit. "All right! I can't wait - let's go!"

Kedit gave a soft laugh and hugged him back quickly. "I know you're eager, so go on and I'll meet you there."

Hardly had the words left her mouth than Naruto sped off, running down the streets to the little run down shop that had quickly become his favorite place to eat.

* * *

"So why are you being spastic?" Naruto asked around his mouthful of noodles. "You've been weird all morning."

"Don't talk with your mouth full, brat," Kedit chastised absently. She calmly slurped some of her ramen and chewed it slowly, deliberately, just to make the child wait. "I'm trying to find the perfect place."

Naruto pushed his bowl aside and signaled for a new one. "Miso, please." Then he faced his aunt. "For what?"

Kedit paused, seeming to look a little unsure as Naruto was handed his fifth bowl of ramen, and finally spoke softly, "A wedding."

Naruto, in the middle of slurping hot noodles, coughed and choked and almost, he claimed later, died if Kedit hadn't whacked him on the back with enough force to almost send him to the ground. "What was that for, brat?!" Kedit cried as Naruto continued to gag.

Naruto grabbed the napkin the chef had shoved in his face and proceeded to cough up a few noodles. Then he glared at the Fox sitting next to him, shouting, "If you're going to surprise the hell out of me, wait until I'm done, _baba_!"

"Damnit, brat," Kedit shrieked, glad she and Naruto were the only people in the restaurant. "I should smack you again – don't call me that!"

"_Baba_, _baba_, _baba_!" Naruto yelped as Kedit hit him again on the side of the head. "Besides, who would marry you, you abusive, mean, unlady-like, brash, vulgar, old woman Fox?"

Kedit kicked Naruto's chair out from under him, dropping Naruto to the floor. She contemplated kicking him, but instead turned back to her food, deciding to eat it before it got too cold. "If you must know, Jean-_dono_ proposed to me last night."

Naruto stopped his wave of cursing and blinked up owlishly at Kedit who was blushing hotly. "But you don't have a ring on."

"Jean_-dono."_ She busied her mouth with her ramen when the word came out like a squeak. Naruto pulled himself back into his seat and looked at his aunt in amazement as she swallowed and continued. "Jean-_dono_ said he'd use his next check to buy me a ring." She glanced sidelong at Naruto, eyes and cheeks almost the same color. "Where'd you learn about the ring, anyway?"

Naruto frowned as a wave of homesickness washed over him suddenly. "Iruka-_niisan_ took me to the movies a few times when I was little. One of them was a romance."

Silence befell them, broken only by Naruto slurping his noodles loudly. Kedit looked at her first half-empty bowl and then at the four empty ones next to Naruto. With a quiet sigh, she placed a hand comfortingly on the top of the child's head, smiling as he murmured a soft noise of contentment.

* * *

This chapter was actually rahter fun to write. I'm glad I could get it out before what I'm sure is going to be a two-month-at-least dry spell from me. Gah, stupid life gets in my way -.-

Anyway, I own neither FMA nor Naruto. So, till next time!


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